Six Things I Wish Young Progressives Knew

The Forward-To-Your-Favorite-Young'un Version

Hey Sighers —

Some of you asked for a version of this list that you could forward to the young people in your lives. So here you go.

—Dashka

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Dear Young Progressive,

If you’re getting this, it’s probably because one of the olds in your life forwarded it to you, and for that I apologize. The terrible thing about life is that in the process of living it you end up learning a few things, and then you want to tell younger people what you learned in the hope that they can benefit, and the next thing you know you’re one of those droning old people offering unsolicited advice to the young, which is frankly embarrassing. My only comfort is that it will happen to you, too. Sooner than you think.

I spend a lot of my time talking about how amazing your generation is, how activist, how thoughtful, how dedicated to justice and equality, how willing to accept people for who they are. I spend another portion of my time talking about how much pressure you’re under, particularly from the digital forces that seek to manipulate you, profit from you, expose you, and surveil you. Overall, your generation has done a pretty amazing job of growing up under that intense and unremitting pressure (not to mention the other stuff like climate change and income inequality and let’s just stop here before we all start sobbing). I love being around you, hearing your perspectives on things, and being allied with you in the fight for a better world.

But And I spend some amount of time watching you make mistakes that hurt not only you, but the progressive ideals we’re all working toward. And so I made a list of a few things I wish you knew. Here they are. Let me know what you think.

1. Coalitions require compromise.

Why does the right outmaneuver us so often? Well, they’re richer and willing to cheat, so that gives them an advantage from the git-go. But the left doesn’t help itself with its constant purity tests and eagerness to eject anyone who doesn’t agree on every single issue. Broad coalitions get more accomplished than narrow ones, and that means it’s useful to build a tolerance for disagreement, even on issues you care passionately about.

If you want to fight climate change, for example, that might mean working with religious groups who don’t agree with you on reproductive choice. Is reproductive choice a fundamental human rights issue? Yes. Is it okay to work alongside someone who doesn’t agree with you on one of your core values in order to get something done that you both agree on? Also, yes.

Political positions aren’t viruses — you won’t catch cooties from working alongside someone whose perspective — even on very important issues — isn’t the same as yours. In fact, your work on the issue you have in common may build bridges that make them more receptive to hearing your perspective on the places where you differ. Hell, you might even learn something yourself. If you want an example of an unlikely set of allies, check out the history behind this button.

2. Language isn’t as important as you think.

I’m a writer; I care about language more than most people. I believe that precision is vital and that it’s basic courtesy to use the words people feel are accurate and respectful when talking about them. But language is also a way of signaling in-group membership, and too often young progressives use the language of social justice as a velvet rope. When you’re constantly monitoring people for infractions, it’s a sign that you’re acting like a cop.

The focus on how people say things, rather than what they’re saying, is a surefire way to make sure that your coalitions are narrow and easily defeated. And, since I can point social justice-y fingers as well as anyone, I’ll note that judging people on whether they have successfully excised formerly-acceptable words from their speech and replaced them with the latest buzzwords from the academy is classist, agist, nativist, and ableist. People process language in different ways, and just because it was easy for you to make a vocabulary switch doesn’t mean it’s as easy for someone else.

3. Shame doesn’t teach.

We know that calling a child stupid doesn’t help them learn to read. We know that carceral systems are unjust and counterproductive. But too often the same people who condemn the school-to-prison pipeline and other carceral structures want to apply punitive justice to people who have said or done things that they don’t agree with.

But shame doesn’t teach. If you want people to hear you, if you are interested in bringing people into your movement rather than kicking them out of it, you’ll find that calling in works better than calling out. More importantly, respecting the dignity of all human beings should be the one value you never compromise on, even when the human being in question has hurt or offended you,

4. If voting didn’t matter, they wouldn’t be trying to stop you from doing it.

Our democracy might be a janky old hooptie with one flat tire, a missing catalytic converter, a hissing radiator, and a fender dragging on the ground, but it’s the only ride we’ve got. And I can’t believe I have to say this in the wake of the Trump presidency, but the lesser of two evils is significantly better than the greater of two evils. I would have thought an insurrection, family separations at the border, a $2 trillion tax cut for the rich, the overturning of Roe, the Muslim ban, a nearly successful attempt to torpedo Obamacare, the failed Covid response, and all the other horrors of the Trump presidency would have been enough to settle this question once and for all, but apparently it isn’t.

So let’s walk through this one more time. The reality is that for over 150 years we’ve had a two-party, winner-take-all system. The party that gets the most votes gets to make the rules, including about how — or if — the next election is conducted. They also get to appoint the judges who determine which basic freedoms are available to the most marginalized among us. Like it or not, voting for a third-party candidate is the same as not voting. (See the elections of 2000 and 2016, which gave us the Supreme Court that overturned Roe.). Next year, not voting for Biden would mean a second term for an unrepentant, unleashed, and unhinged Trump. Maybe you feel like you’ve got nothing to lose, but there are people more vulnerable than you who do.

5. It’s the boring stuff that impacts people’s lives.

Transportation policy. Veteran’s affairs. Environmental regulations. Food and agriculture policy. Immigration policy. Health care rules. Land use regulations. Tax policy. The stuff that actually determines whether people are happy, healthy, and safe is usually buried in the wonky details. Getting good policies passed often means choosing among a bunch of less-than-ideal options because that’s what’s available. You can be mad at your representatives. You can pressure them to do better. You can work to defeat them. You can try to replace them by running yourself. But never discount the importance of the work they do.

6. It’s okay not to have the answers.

You don’t have to have an opinion on every topic. You don’t have to pretend to know the solution to intractable problems or stake out a position on complex issues. You don’t have to “choose a side,” no matter how loudly people are screaming that failing to do so is immoral. Sometimes both sides are immoral. Sometimes the moral position is to admit that your own confusion. Uncertainty is an uncomfortable place but it’s also an honest one. It’s the place where inquiry begins. Instead of settling for easy answers, it’s better to keep asking questions.

With a sigh,

Dashka